Eldorado Gallery

A little east of Coronado High School 

is Eldorado Park where 

my dog and I walk and ponder

It’s where Rusty’s just trying to figure out 

who has lifted a leg as he sniffs the trees

Dog’s version of Facebook

but less odious than the pee soaked internet

I try to figure out everything else

Every year beginning in the Fall

there’s a strange happening at our park

Pieces of art appear 

A plaster of Paris sculpture

smashed on the pavement

Paintings laying face down in the grass

or propped up against trees 

Others sitting on benches

as if waiting for someone to 

stop and take a look

It took some musing

while visiting this outdoor gallery

but after multiple discussions with Rusty

we finally had an oh! moment

Eldorado is the path students trudge 

on their way home from school

Kids forced to get a fine arts credit

sign up for studio art 

Likely thinking 

I can't dance 

I don’t appreciate their music

Maybe I do have a talent

for something

Maybe art

They complete their assignments

in the chaotic art room

hoping the acrylics on canvas 

will express just a little 

of their guarded inner self

The frazzled teacher will sigh and say

You made an effort

You'll pass

Friends look at their art and 

nervously ask 

What is it?

Artist becomes traitor saying

It’s nothing

It’s stupid  

After seventh period

they  trudge back through Eldorado

carrying their insecure self-expression

A gauntlet of critical voices in their heads

How do you defend something 

you don't understand 

Something that scares you

Adults will call the piece 

artsy-fartsy and add 

You know artists are weird

Freaks

Look at that Warhol guy

Others are quick to say 

Artists never make a living

They starve

It all sounds like a threat

So the art makes it to the park

Where it’s dropped to the ground

to be hosed down by sprinklers

speared by the groundskeeper 

scraped into a dumpster

eventually leaving in a garbage truck

Eldorado’s Graveyard Gallery

Where art and dreams go to die

Painting saved from the Eldorado Graveyard Gallery.

Woman in the Park

I walked the park with Rusty 

my three legged dog

Breathing deep the cut grass air

Trying to ignore the 

Church's Fried Chicken funk

saturating the breeze


Should be only good feels since 

I was reveling in new found freedom 


After thirty years and 

two exhausting attempts at wedded bliss

I was living a woman free life

Women are wonderful

endlessly fascinating

filling life with exhilarating confusion


But they are

a lot

of work


At the end of our walk of freedom

a woman stopped to ask

as people always do

about my three legged dog


I told the cancer story so many times

for a change I wanted to say 

he lost his leg in Nam

but that would be inappropriate

and not funny


While we chatted, I thought

This woman is interesting

smart

fun to talk to

Maybe . . .

just coffee

or share a Colt 45

The beer not the gun


A screaming in my head distracted me

It was my voice of reason 

Who due to lack of resources

just worked part time 


What the fuck?

Five minutes ago

you were wallowing in freedom 

Now this?


Oh yeah

Freedom

Woman free life

Happiness


After I said goodbye to her

Rusty hopped and I walked home 

with conflicting emotions 


He was pissed we were leaving

I had regrets


That woman seemed a little more sane 

than others

We made a connection

and 

she had some really cool stuff 

in her shopping cart


Castillo Sat in a Place of Honor

 

He didn’t want to sit next to the open grave

He wanted to stand in the back with his family

But there was an empty chair waiting for Castillo

 

His eyes fixed on the dirt and rocks

The crowd parted as a woman led him

To the place of honor

 

A hundred white people

Struggled to find footing on the rocky ground,

Trying not to step on graves

 

They felt superior to the Mexican

Some pronounced his name Kuh still oh

Rhyming it with Brillo

 

But because the body in the box was his friend

Because that good white man in the casket

Loved that good brown man

 

Castillo sat in a place of honor.

Bobby Downey

 

They had him.

It was behind Woolworths.

They had Bobby Downey.

He was retarded.

He was a child.

He was in junior high school, but he was a child.

 

One of the teachers in our God-awful school,

filled with hostile rednecks,

had committed a crime.

She bought Bobby new clothes to replace the filthy rags he wore.

Bobby’s new clothes had given him confidence.

 

Someone cared.

He mattered.

 

But they had him behind the Woolworths

in his new clothes.

He was retarded.

Nobody wanted him confident.

He didn’t matter.

 

They circled him.

They were smarter.

They knew exactly what to say.

Within seconds, they had him.

 

Coolly manipulating, they made him furious.

He did just what they wanted.

He attacked.

But they were smarter and stronger.

 

They beat Bobby.

 

How dare he wear new clothes?

How dare he be confident?

How dare he be retarded?

 

I stood there in my seventy-pound body

with my pencil thin wrists

dying for Bobby.

Hating my world where Bobby Downey

couldn’t just wear new clothes.

Hating a world where Bobby

couldn’t just feel good.

 

Standing behind the Woolworths

watching Bobby cry,

I knew I’d never feel okay again.

A couple times a year

I see a lone Canadian goose

floating in the pond at our park

I used to think it was sad

left behind by the flock

too old to keep up

Retirement gave me a different perspective

Maybe the old goose just had enough of

frantically migrating a thousand miles

twice a year

with a bunch of assholes honking at them

Just maybe, the old goose said

in goose speak-

You guys go on without me

You’ll be fine.

I’ll stay here.

I’ll be fine too.

Then it lives out its days floating in the pond

No assholes honking